Letter: Randy Ihara, South Riding

Editor: I was so deeply saddened to read in Loudoun Now of the tragic loss of another young life to suicide in Loudoun County.

A cherished and beloved 17-year old could no longer bear the deep, unremitting pain of an immense depression that condemned him to suffer in silence, all the while forcing him to display a pleasing demeanor to the outside world.

No one suspected, for the disease of depression is a cruel master that lurks in the dark recesses of the mind and body allowing few external signs of its presence. That’s why no one knew or suspected, but the silence is also reinforced by an all-consuming fear, a fear that if someone found out they would think less of him, think he was “crazy,” or worse—weak. Besides, what could anyone do to make the pain go away?

I also understand the pain, bewilderment, and later, anger, of those left behind. There is no blame to be borne. You will come to accept that you are not responsible for the loss of life: You were responsible for giving him life. The emotional hole torn into the delicate fabric of the family that loved him seems beyond repair. But the passage of time has a way of acting eventually as a soothing balm until the pain of loss eventually fades imperceptibly into warm memories where he will live in your heart forever.

I hope these few paltry sentences can alleviate at least a small portion of the pain you are feeling. I, and many others, can only offer our sympathies and good wishes, and pray for your recovery.

Randy Ihara, South Riding

Friends of Loudoun Mental Health

One thought on “Letter: Randy Ihara, South Riding

  • 2016-01-21 at 3:41 pm

    That’s a very kind letter. Every time I see another similar headline, my heart sinks. It is so sad.

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